On change, adaptability, and new things

This week, I have some exciting news. I’m starting a new job!

Technically, I don’t start until Monday, but it’s exciting all the same. It’s actually a little weird too; just this morning, the HR person for my new employer asked what I’d need shipped to the house to work, which was just completely new to me as historically an office worker.

It’s a big change, for sure. Many of you who’ve been around for a while will remember exactly how excited I was when I landed the job I have now back in May 2018. It was the end of a very dark period for me in terms of my mental health and self-worth, and better yet, I’d managed it on the merit of this very blog.

Lately, though, there’s been a lot of change.

Normally, I like to think I’m a relatively adaptable person, though I definitely have the things I will put my foot down about. Especially with my work, I’ve learned it’s important to be flexible, because the number of times I’ve had to shift priorities at the last second would’ve driven me insane otherwise.

Back in December, a chain of events kicked off that would prove too much for me.

On my birthday last year, the company I work for ended up buying another company. That in itself actually wasn’t so bad; I’d survived it before, and was excited about the prospect of having new things to talk about and new people to work with.

They didn’t really tell us how it would all come together until the beginning of January. And when they did, I discovered I’d essentially been pushed down to where I was when I first started, with all my major projects and strategy assigned to a new manager that I didn’t know.

At first, I tried to be open about it, but the more time passed, the more I realized that I couldn’t really see a path up from there anymore. I felt like I was there for production, and that just didn’t sit well with me—especially after how hectic and burnout-inducing last year was for me.

While this was all happening, a former colleague reached out to me about a job she was looking to fill.

At first, I wasn’t sure; it felt like a gamble when I wasn’t sure how things would play out where I was. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized it would be a good thing for me—it had all the strategy, planning, and big-picture stuff that had been taken off my plate, in an entirely new world that would challenge my brain to learn and grow.

So I decided I’d go for it.

That in itself was actually a little crazy for me. I’ve never really considered myself an ambitious person; I’m happy to do what I need to so I can create a good life for my little family, and beyond that, I just like to push myself to see what I can learn and share with others.

This is the second time in my entire career I’ve made a choice to change jobs so I could grow and go on to bigger things—the first time being when I got out of my part-time university job to actually start my career.

It’s also the first time I’ve ever felt like I was standing up for my own self-worth and value by making a change for myself. And, admittedly, the first time I’ve ever felt like I had to stand up for that.

I’m glad I was able to make that decision and stand up for myself when it came down to it. And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t excited about it. I have high hopes: I hope it’s everything I think it’s going to be. I hope it helps me rekindle my love for creation, rather than just production. I hope it helps me find energy outside of work again.

I hope it’s the right kind of change—and I really think it will be.